#53. Mid-ame Psychosis
Infohazard Zendaya, spiritual bottoms, Elon's AI plans, manmade wonders, the absolute state of advertising, and much more!
Welcome to the NRP. We are publishing the absolute best of those extremely online extremists known as the new right — “All the shit that’s fit to poast.”
Male Gazing of the Week
> Holy shit, people. Is Zendaya some kind of mid-tier Joelle Van Dyne? The M.G.O.A.T.? To gaze upon her makeup-free face and messy bun is to expose oneself to a sensory pleasure so aggressively middle of the road, so not blonde, so 4.0 - 7.0, so offensive to look at, so offensively unremarkable, that one is rendered catatonic, drooling, babbling about how much hotter women were in the ‘90s, for the rest of their life?
The NRP thinks ALL women are queens, so it’s hard for us to relate. Like, if you think Zendaya — this woman right here — is a 4, that puts her a mere three steps up from, say, Mama June. Have you ever been in a WalMart? A Target, even. Can you conceptualize the average human (not anime) female?
Threads of the Week
> Countere Magazine on the value of protecting our nation’s precious reserves of tinfoil hat-wearing, bigfoot tracking, chemtrail fretting, flouride hating kooks. They may look silly, but someone’s gotta poke at the cathedral-imposed-and-enforced boundaries of The Science™.
> Cheese For Everyone says the Dems and Republicans “switching” ideological sides is an F&G midwit meme.
> Meta Prime speculates about Elon’s plans to immanentize the basilisk before a bunch of idiots do.
> Sanfedisti writes about why our society is no longer reserving its valuable land tiles (or coast tiles, in some cases) to construct wonders over the course of centuries. It’s because we hate ourselves and want to die. PLUS: Bonus Sanfedisti name explainer.
> FischerKing begs you to please build some goddam factories so we don’t have to send our boys to die in the South China Sea.
> Johann Kurtz on how the land shapes the people (and vice versa) in Dune, and why it’s absurd for fantasy adaptations to do the “dIvErSe cAsT” thing they’re all doing now.
> Absolute god-tier shitposting from RadFem Hitler, who argues that men want blowjobs because they are 'spiritual bottoms’ who want to sit back in their La-Z-Boys and get passively fucked. I don’t know, RadFem, have you ever had a bj? They’re kinda good.
Audio/Video of the Week
> Elon won’t let me embed the tweet, we stan the pigtailed girl who does goofy TikTok dances while explaining that BlackRock and Vanguard own everything on the planet. Unlike poster Josh Lekach, we love her Carol Burnett-tier physical comedy. Again, the NRP editorial board reiterates that ALL women are queens.
> Radfem Hitler (damn, two in one week??) knows the reason God made you autistic.
Longread of the Week
> I hate to keep shilling week after week for
but the guy can't stop hittin' dingers. This week, an insider's look at the Bud Light kerfuffle, and more broadly, the ad industry, a rat king of failed artists and novelists who despise the proles they're aiming to persuade.